Husband feminism reddit feminism requires focusing on the bigger picture to liberate an entire class of people, not constantly reiterating everyone's individual interest. Yes this totally happens. He couldn’t work if I wasn’t providing the childcare and domestic labour that I do. Welcome to the raddest feminist club on Reddit! I did not know I was going to be up as a militant feminist where I married and took his name, almost 50 years ago. 5K subscribers in the LibJerk community. We’ve been married almost 22 years and I still get mail from extended family, but my side, addressed to me, but with my husband’s last name. Welcome to TwoXChromosomes, a subreddit for both serious and silly content, and intended for women's perspectives. It doesn't necessarily sound like you want to be dependent. . I don't think it makes you a bad feminist at all. The older relatives on both my side of the family and my husband's insist upon giving me my husband's last name on all correspondence. Nevertheless, everyone should have sexual freedom. Equal rights for women. While our project described her song, All About That Bass, as non-feminist due to not showing respect for all women for all sizes, we did label her song Dear Future Husband as a feminist work. We are pretty politically engaged. We were both young--low 20s. After all, if your girl cheats on you just dump her, solved. Being a feminist does not mean that a person has to consider not being in a committed relationship, or not having children. This is a sub for mocking liberals from a leftist (non-tankie) perspective. My husband and l overall have a healthy marriage. My wife was a children's librarian and feminist AF, and found the best way to address feminism with young kids was to read picture books about influential (often little known) women throughout history. Well, a husband/man entered the chat and made the most absurd argument that feminists are to blame for the pay gap. Virgin on the wedding night, dress modestly so you don’t make your husband’s lust surface, be submissive. As a women grows up, becomes 18-19 and has literally every man giving her attention, she then realizes the great power of whats between her legs. If you've wondered what most feminists think about certain things, what our response is to certain issues, how we think certain things should be handled, or why we have adopted the positions and stands that we have, this is your place to get your questions answered! Being decent is being decent. So most of these are not true for me personally. (1) This study examined/argued the causal impact of promoted women's increased likelihood of divorce is due to traditional gender norms on couple formation, both men and women who reached top jobs have relationships that initially focused on the husband's career and the promotion seems to be the final straw in a long process of moving away from Lately in the radical feminist circles I mix in I am beginning doubt my own feminist beliefs and if feminism is even for me. Husband two had a name I liked a lot more than mine, so I took it. God damn it. Husband number one had a name I didn’t like, so I kept my own. My husband handles the day to day finances and budgeting, but we decide financial priorities and large financial decisions together. I just saw a TikTok about how you cannot be a feminist and take your husband's last name and I felt shameful, but was also offended. 74 votes, 45 comments. It sounds like you want something extremely sensible and reasonable: a financially stable partner that does not deter from your dreams of family and career, so that both of you can fall back on each other in hard financial times, and if you want to stay home and raise your kids for awhile, you can do so. A feminist’s definition of a good husband encompasses multifaceted traits and responsibilities that honor partnership and empathy, fostering a relationship that enriches both partners. now, more important is the name given to the children, that will require tact and diplomacy, they could be given double surname or an entirely new surname. I, like my partner, was born into and raised in a fundimentalist, cult like religion, in a place that was dominated by that religion. They actually counseled me to “go off the pill” and trick him into having a baby without his consent. My husband and I were able to support each other as we moved away from both our conservative upbringings. r/Feminism • Katie Ledecky breaks Michael Phelps' record for most individual world titles | At the World Aquatic Championships in Fukoka, Japan, Ledecky collected her 16th world title by winning the 800-meter freestyle | we salute you 🏾 In the year of our Lord 2024, women are still doing most of the housework and chores compared to men. This is a place to ask feminists your questions and to discuss the issues with feminists. Equal respect for women. It produced the first anarcha-feminist newspaper, La Voz de la Mujer. Both husband and wife hyphenated, so it was equal, not just her who ended up with the hyphen. The insistence that we should be worried about boys being harmed by feminism is fueled by either (1) the belief that feminism's goal is female supremacy or (2) an underlying assumption that we should care more about boys than girls and nonbinary kids. An example, my husband and I went to the same college and graduated together. And then i realised that today children are used as a way to dictate women’s lives and most aren’t given the opportunity to choose for themselves whether they want children, a husband and a picture perfect family. No God, No Boss, No Husband: The world’s first Anarcha-Feminist group The world’s first explicitly anarchist-feminist group was created as part of the thriving nineteenth-century Anarchist movement in Argentina. As your husband he should truly love you, regardless of your choices. His response was that he asks them how small to make it. Even though Women are informed to declare their earning, they dont declare it. Saw a video of a woman whose husband was an OBGYN. 2 failed engagements and nothing looking better from here relationship-wise, I've reset my goals to just getting a cottage in Scandinavia somewhere, a dog, and maybe a cat and calling life complete at that point. actually she argues this mind-body dualism began cropping up around This is a place to ask feminists your questions and to discuss the issues with feminists. I’ve always been more left leaning but I had my major feminist awakening in the past year since having our daughter and Roe being overturned. I really enjoyed time with my husband before we had a baby! another victims of "honor killing" this young woman got killed by her husband Infront of her shildren over a pics without a hijabe the husband shoot his wife over 10+ bullet the young bother already make peace with the husband saying that he would do the same that husband did was for his honor Women who bear their husbands' children become sensitized to their husband's antigens, which means they're much more likely to reject an organ. YASS,She got rid of her love for her Abusive Mysogynistic Patriachal husband,Women power 😊😊😊 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 (Edit:I am a male ,decided to larp as a feminist for fun. What passes for feminism today is too often double standards and victimology. Both of them are just as good as each other,it's not like dabba has even graduated and got some job with her hard work and dedication and is then preaching Perhaps you and your husband should regularly review your arrangement and make sure it is still mutually acceptable, it is also not feminist if you are pushing him into a "male" role. Explain to him how his words have made you feel. In the future I want to marry a man and marriage is something I always wanted however my the radical feminists I talk to express pure disapproval of my future choices. I consider myself a progressive and a feminist, and this was the right choice for me. However he thinks that feminism is useless and counterproductive. Societal expectations are a lot stronger there and the consensus of the Sexual Revolution. This type of feminist made these concessions to appease conservatives early on in the movement's history or they just weren't thinking that far ahead. (As long as you don’t sell your bath water ;) ) I hope this helped 🙂💚 Lol, All the comments show utter dumbassery, ik it's a choice of your husband, your husband shouldn't take your name, just as you shouldn't take his, value individuality. It would be super-weird if "being a good feminist" required you to be a top in the bedroom in all situations. If a feminist wants those things, they can go after them, if they don't want them, they don't have to. Despite what online men scream, believing that women are an oppressed group and should have their rights upheld is a good thing. Takes responsibility for his choices, is pro-choice, supports queer rights, supports Black Lives Matter, helps around the house without being asked, and is comfortable with making less money than I do. We are a welcoming subreddit and support the rights of all genders. Authentic feminist analysis is being silenced. People really like to throw penis mutilation in the ring whenever the "husband's stitch" gets brought up, seemingly ignorant or blatantly ignoring the fact that genital mutilation is not a singularly penis-having problem. " When mentioning this room while describing the house to my husband's cousin, he literally shook his head and started lecturing me on how I was too young to have kids. If not, then something similar). I am a medical student at the University of Miami Miller School of Medicine, and I’m conducting a study that will explore the health and societal impacts of the Husband Stitch on people who have undergone this procedure. , My husband took my last name as well and he keeps getting sooooo many opinions and sexist comments about that! I did expect some comments but definitely not to that extent. Marvel and DC are just companies pandering to feminism in order to profit more in the name of “equality and inclusion”. Went through the this same exact thing with my husband. Is he out there screaming from the rooftops about it, no (neither are most women who identify as feminist). Partly out of repspect for my family name and my parents. It was about ultimate power - the husband legally could do almost anything they wanted to the wife, children or slaves. Not taking your husband's name was kind of a new idea in that time and place. my friend recently dated a guy for 6 months who swore up and down that he was voting for harris only to find out that he lied about his beliefs I know my husband since we are kids and we are dating for 10 years. HOWEVER I get enraged when people refer to me as Mrs. Hey y'all, I first heard Meghan Trainor's song, Dear Future Husband, a few months ago when giving a presentation of feminist/non-feminist artists. Thankfully my husband is very happy with his decision and couldn't care less about outdated views like that. At the most basic level, men's rights are the legal rights that are granted to… Ithink you have it exactly right. I know it’s easy for us because we’re not having children, but I can’t help but be disappointed when my self-proclaimed feminist friends change their last names when they get married. The woman does not have to take the husband's surname. He was the first man in my life to tell me I could have a career if I wanted, and not just start having babies right away. Hi r/Feminism!I’ve noticed discussion on this page about the Husband Stitch. The idea isn't that Aristophanes was a feminist or that, somehow, 20th/21st century feminism was born in 411 BCE. Feminism is inherently for women. Welcome to the feminism community! This is a space for discussing and promoting… I heard a election radio ad once for some opposition party in Maharashtra, criticising demonitization. Taking a husband's name is steeped in the idea of possession, but so is having your dad's surname. 1st - I told him what I was going through and how hurt it me. Being a feminist may involve some level of decency, but it does not make you inherently feminist to do the same things a feminist might. They also said that we don't say "wife and husband" because it looks weird. One of the main ones that I called my husband out on tonight is his shaming of my "number". there is obviously nothing I did not know I was going to be up as a militant feminist where I married and took his name, almost 50 years ago. With the most respect possible - feminism or ‘western’ feminism is not your issue here, your husband wanting to insult you is. i guess it could be called a crux period but yes, what bordo discusses isn’t a consequence of second wave feminism. To my understanding, penis mutilation, when done correctly by a medical professional, is a one-time issue. He goes out of his way to hire women. (Lights, Camera, Alice is a great example. Yes. I died My husband is a feminist and would applaud incentives like you describe. actually it is technically somewhere between first and second wave feminism - especially around the 40s when women really actually began joining the workforce. It’s OUR money. Posted by u/sparklemom2000 - 1,411 votes and 83 comments As a feminist, it was impossible for me to be the feminist I wanted to be and be married into that role and make him happy. girls. But she eventually came around and calls herself feminist, and she credited her change in thinking to the influence of her friend, Lena Dunham (another talented woman whom many people seem to dislike). We don’t fight that much but the thing we fight about most is political topics, feminism etc. I also don't see how many of these are necessarily bad or anti feminist unless there's an unbalanced power structure in the relationship. But the absolute worst was when my MIL and her mom assumed I wanted a baby (I sure didn’t) and it was my husband who didn’t (he loves kids). While I'm pro sex work, especially decriminalization of sex workers, my Bf finds sex work harmful for women and supports the nordic model. But when I put it down on paper, he agreed to give his kid my last name. Jan 8, 2018 · I painted my husband as a bad feminist for a long time, because he wouldn’t call himself a feminist. 275K subscribers in the Feminism community. We hope this space will be a home for growing numbers of women who are disillusioned with mainstream/3rd wave faux-feminism. After 23 years, I've given up correcting them. Watching them disregard every word my soon-to-be-ex-husband tried to say to them, and watching my soon-to-be-ex-husband basically fume, was quite the spectacle. 4 woman are r4ped in India every hour and that does not even include the unreported cases and marital r4pe cases, where a husband is legally allowed to r4pe his wife as long as she’s >=15 years old. my comment is clearly in the context of increasingly limited access to safe abortions and the apparent possibility of several states overturning no-fault divorce. You were your father's property until you were sold to your husband. My husband and I bought a house that has an extra tiny bedroom that the real estate agent called a "nursery. We have three young kids. Then I met my husband and felt like I met someone who made me feel safe and respected and wanted, then a year into our relationship I found out he was asking an old friend for her nudes. While men continue to expect women to take on their mothers’ roles as matriarchal maids, nurses, nannies, and caretakers, and be a pretty toy to fuck/look at. 348K subscribers in the MensRights community. The former can be clarified (at least to people who are open to listening), but the latter Women who bear their husbands' children become sensitized to their husband's antigens, which means they're much more likely to reject an organ. It’s totally okay to want that as long as you’re sure that you actually want it. 1K votes, 32 comments. Male friends have ended up trying to ask for sex even though I had never given that impression; i started to become afraid of men and expect the worst. If feminism champions it for women, then great. Jack Smith until I wrote them an email about how fucking sexist it was that I got a degree same as him and didn't get me own address labels So I would say your husband doesn't really hate feminism, he dislikes the way the loud extreme part of the movement drowns out the reasonable people. Welcome to the feminism community! This is a space for discussing and promoting awareness of issues… I never got a notification for this and barely use reddit anymore but I wanted to just reply. Welcome to the feminism community! This is a space for discussing and promoting awareness of issues related to equality for women. Feminism is very important to me and I like discussing various topics and politics around the subject. I'm more experienced than him and since the start of our relationship struggles with sex he's used this as something to shame me with in a variety of ways. Nov 7, 2024 · Feminism advocates for equality, and it also delves into creating a supportive, loving, and equitable dynamic within modern marriages. Yes, men will benefit from the outcomes of feminism actively dismantling the patriarchy. The woman was crying\complaining that her father died in the ATM queue, but her inlaws kept demanding dowry and she was saying demo killed her father and was cursing govt instead of the inlaws who are demanding the dowry. Thank you to all of those who have spoken out about your experiences. Your beliefs, actions and remarks, will determine if you are a feminist, not if you are supportive of someone you breed with. She's not particularly feminist at all, but she worked hard for the title and wanted to keep it. The problem here wasn’t that she cheated. When I've seen Lysistrata referred to as a feminist text, it tends to be with full acknowledgement that it was, at best, feminist compared to other Greek plays, or that it has ideas that could, in adaptation, make a feminist point. And I hope you realize that feminism doesn’t tell anyone to murder their husbands. Many years ago, an interviewer asked her if she was feminist, and she said she didn't like to think of things in terms of guys vs. I’m like, “you see him every 5ish years at a wedding, funeral, graduation party, etc. We have a lot of fun together, but when it comes to this topic of feminism (twice a year I would say) we almost always disagree. I became a feminist after I got married and changed my name. The greatest power tool that any women has is, what's between her legs. As a feminist scholar, I read and watch so many journal articles, video essays, and media that condemn exactly what I did. I've heard some people say they like the idea of being a united front, or team, but my husband and I feel like that with different To the people of Ephesus, the husband as the head of the household had nothing to do with 20th Century notions of "if you can't decide something, the husband is the deal-breaker" or whatever soft conservative notion is around now. The whole having to dress modestly so they won’t make their husband’s lust surface is just nonsense. It's up to you whether you take it or not. " Or if you have feedback or ideas and would like a feminist response to your thoughts, this is a place to have that discussion. My sister is a doctor and wanted to remain Dr. We we're taking about sex work and things got a little heated. I’m 32 now, and have only had one friend hyphenate their name. You don’t need to show such contempt for it. Members Online Donald Trump has vowed if reelected to work "side by side" with a religious organization that wants abortion "eradicated" including exceptions for the life of the mother. As an outsider to the movement, I would say organized feminist groups need to make more of an effort to include men and minorities in order to progress. If you've wondered what most feminists think about certain things, what our response is to certain issues, how we think certain things should be handled, or why we have adopted the positions and stands that we have, this is your place to get your questions answered! Or if you have feedback or ideas and With the most respect possible - feminism or ‘western’ feminism is not your issue here, your husband wanting to insult you is. Korean cultural expectations for women subjects them to much more submissive/obedient caretakers, than any other country I have been to or lived in. Here we insist on the continuing relevance of a feminist critique. So feminism led women down the path that sexual freedom was a good thing, which is a "lie". I have a couple sets of friends who both changed their names, and made the new name a combination of the two, precisely because they didn't want to buy into the patriarchal tradition of the woman "taking" the husband's name. We do have a lot of conversations about gendered expectations regarding D/s play and how those preferences and choices don't occur in a vacuum, but that's a larger discussion. It will become the responsibility of the husband, to prove that she is working and earning since she didnt declare it. Thoughtful, open, honest discussion is desperately needed. They like to send out address labels every year with the college logo on it, and for the longest time kept sending them as Mrs. If I want I can list my spouse in my passport. ) Reply reply Yet these women are suppose to initiate sex. My husband is very pro-feminism. I took his name as a way to separate from my dysfunctional family and I’m very happy. As a person bringing up children , you can make sure you are not allowing "gender roles" to influence them. The problem was that she murdered her husband. ) Kids are smart. My family is worse though--instead of using the last name that I share with them, they take guesses at my husband's last name. Feminism led to the pill, which led to sexual freedom, which is of course immoral. Leftist feminists believe in sharing the chores and work in relationships, and don't believe in any necessities or expectations. How is a woman suppose to know it’s OK to initiate sex with all these rules. true. Fucking disgusting. I constantly feel the need to justify it and feel so much shame. Honestly, at times I wish I was a bi-demisexual instead of being the worst combination possible: a straight demisexual with a high sex driveand yes, feminist. The whole post in the subreddit was about how we always say "men and women" or "husband and wife" and never put women or wife first. My husband is still a feminist but I am slowly converting him. This is why many couples in this kind of situation go for paired donation (husband in couple A gives their organ to wife in couple B and vice versa). 15 votes, 29 comments. When she learned about the husband stitch she asked her husband if guys ever ask for it (I think. Feminism destroyed my parents marriage and almost ended mine! I thankfully found the redpill before too much damage was done. I told him I was not expecting sex from him and I like that he feels comfortable enough to say no and should always continue doing that when he doesn’t feel like that. In reddit i read a few posts where guys had to pay alimony even after wife was earning proper amount only. 281K subscribers in the Feminism community. If you've wondered what most feminists think about certain things, what our response is to certain issues, how we think certain things should be handled, or why we have adopted the positions and stands that we have, this is your place to get your questions answered! As a woman and feminist who recently took my husband’s last name, I think it’s more important to have a choice in the matter (to take it, not take it, hyphenate it, whatever). 5. He trusts women figures of authority (his doctor, etc. HisFirstName OurLastName. Welcome to the raddest feminist club on Reddit! My husband is the breadwinner but I have full access to our money and he’s never once called it his money or his paycheck or anything like that. Related to the previous point and also a major plank of the purity culture platform. Posted by u/[Deleted Account] - 194 votes and 30 comments In the year of our Lord 2024, women are still doing most of the housework and chores compared to men. Tell him that whilst you appreciate his concern for you, you love what you are doing and wish to continue. In short, he wouldn’t call himself a feminist, but I would. He supports victims in cases of abuse of course and does not defend abusers. My mom, who is usually insanely feminist, said that she thinks Amber "faked the bruises" because she "wants his money. Posted by u/sachetjane - 4 votes and 5 comments That's what these men don't know and understand. " Like, mom, what? You think someone would hit themselves/get someone else to hit them for money (even though she has plenty of her own), and that somehow makes MORE sense than a man who has a recorded history of girlfriend-beating assaulting his wife???? From that point forward, whenever he would try and stop the crew, they'd look over to me for clarification. I agree sunny left his job and is just purposeless and unambitious , the point is dabba is just plain lucky to be earning and minting money by just holding a camera as soon as she wakes up. I’m also Dutch expat, so any documents I have from back home will always be in my maiden name regardless, as they don’t do legal documents with married name. His feminism absolutely benefits my career and our household income. _____ even after she got married. I didn’t take my husband’s last name. His simplistic reasoning was that, and I quote, "Stay at home moms were the norm until lonely feminists told you all you had to go out and be girl bosses. ). I have never had to make the first move, but I have often chosen to make the first move. exjivtt wzb wvzsdke ugjvl gngsjufb lrynka ikowhq monxwm itvv runtvxw